Homophobics

The church can't seem to make up its mind about homosexuality.  At one end you have Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptists, on the other you have churches that have decided the bible can be interpreted to mean God doesn't actually have a problem with it, and somewhere in the middle you have fundamentalists crying "Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner".

I don't know how to address people who take the route of hatred: I've found that "reason is not automatic . . . Those who deny it cannot be conquered by it" (Ayn Rand).  But I also read my bible, which says:

"You shall not lie with a male as with a woman; it is an abomination." (Leviticus 18:22)

And we know this isn't isolated to the Law of Moses (even though the embellishment about it being an "abomination" ought to be enough to tell us God's feelings on the subject) because Paul writes about it in the new testament:

"Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their heart to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.  For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions.  For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; and the men likewise gave up natural acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error." (Romans 1:24—27)

So yes, homosexuality is a sin.  But even those who adhere to the bible—understanding that it is sin and wanting to witness in love to the homosexual community—often have a difficult time finding the right approach.  When their friends "come out of the closet" and ask to be accepted for "who they are," christians often become awkward, embarrassed, and tongue-tied.  How do you confront someone about a sin when you can't relate to their temptations?  How can you begin to understand what's going on in the head of a homosexual?

Well, I was mulling this over the other day and something occurred to me—an idea so simple I'm not sure why I've not heard it before.  Here's hoping it helps—not just christians in their witness, but any readers who would like to join a church but feel confused about their own sexuality:

There is no such thing as a homosexual.

That's right.  No such thing.  There are no "gays", there are no "lesbians".  I mean, if you're a christian in a conservative church, then you've probably already heard how there's no conclusive evidence to support the idea that some people are "just wired that way", but nevertheless we tend to separate people who are "tempted that way" from "normal people" in our heads.  We have to stop acting like one particular sin makes anyone so much different from us, and we can start by trying to remember that everyone created male or female remains inherently heterosexual.  There are homosexual acts, yes, but anyone who's committed one—or a hundred—can be redeemed by Christ.

The bible never uses the term "homosexual" or anything akin to it.  In Genesis it reads, "Now, the men of Sodom were wicked, great sinners against the Lord" (Genesis 13:13) but we never find out that homosexuality is in the picture until the men go to Lot's house demanding he send out the two angels he has brought into his house as guests.

"But before they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house.  And they called to Lot, 'Where are the men who came to you tonight?  Bring them out to us, that we may know them.'  Lot went out to the men at the entrance, shut the door after him, and said, 'I beg of you, my brothers, do not act so wickedly.  Behold, I have two daughters who have not known any man.  Let me bring them out to you, and do to them as you please. Only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the shelter of my roof.'  But they said, 'Stand back!'  And they said, 'This fellow came to sojourn, and he has become the judge!  Now we will deal worse with you than with them.'  Then they pressed hard against the man Lot, and drew near to break the door down." (Genesis 19:4—9)

—

Lot's parenting aside, the point I'm trying to make is that God does not see people as "homosexual" or "heterosexual".  "For there is no distinction:  for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 2:22—23)*  As long as there is sin people will still undergo homosexual temptations, but "No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man.  God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it." (Romans 10:13)

There's a difference between temptation and sin—you might say that a temptation is a thought that comes to mind before you even realize it's there, while a sin is the act of pursuing that temptation, or even just bringing it back to mind.  Anyone—anyone can be tempted by homosexual thoughts; just because something comes into your head doesn't mean you're fated to be homosexual or whatever.  Just give the thought to God as you would any other temptation.  He loves us and wants us to honor Him with our minds and our bodies.  He DIED to save us from our sins.  He has all the incentive in the world to answer our prayers.

The really gruesome thing about the idea of homosexuality being an "orientation", though, is that it essentially seals off sinners from salvation.  The enemy likes to lead men into sin with all kinds of lies about how it's "okay" or "you'll be forgiven later" only to turn around once they've done the deed and shame them with their own wickedness so they despair of ever being forgiven; with homosexuality, shame isn't even necessary.  If someone truly believes that he cannot help the way he is—that he was just "born that way"—then he will never be able to completely accept what the bible has to say about his lifestyle or understand that God can and will help him overcome his temptations.

We are not defined by our temptations.  We are defined by our standing with the One True Living God, who is mighty to save and deserving of all glory, so we are only either sinners or sinners-saved-by-grace.  Anyone can come to Christ and, with the help of the Holy Spirit, be freed from all the entanglements of his former self.  "Let no sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions.  Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness.  For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace." (Romans 6:12—14)

Please take this as a message of hope and encouragement in the truth of God's Word.  Thank you.

*(Note:  I do not believe I have perverted the spirit of the message, but to dispel possible confusion I should point out that Paul is referring specifically to the distinction between jews and gentiles.)

Why I'm Not a Feminist

Someone described me as a strange paradox of feminism:  Though I've often considered joining the military and I don't enjoy any of the typical "girly" novelties like shoes or accessories, I cringe whenever I hear women talk about equal rights.  I thought I'd explain my position and why, exactly, I'm not in with feminism.

Reason Number One:  It's unbiblical.

"Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, His body, and is Himself its Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands."—Ephesians 5:22-24

If that sounds offensive, it's probably because the idea of trusting any guy enough to completely submit to him is scary.  Which is ironic if you consider the advice at the end of another passage:

"For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord.  And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening."—1 Peter 3:5-6 (emphasis added)

Being a christian, though, I have nothing to fear—and am COMMANDED not to fear, if you read Isaiah 41:10—". . . fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God . . ."  God doesn't promise any girl that she'll marry a man who will love her all her life, but He does promise to be with each and every one of us.  When I get everything I need from God I shouldn't have a problem submitting to a godly husband because we'll both be serving God together.  And if my spouse falls off the wagon I'll just have to learn how to submit to him up until he goes against the word of God.

—Keep in mind, too, the bible says "wives, submit to your husbands", not "women, submit to all men".  Important distinction right there.

Reason Number Two:  It's unfair.

Everything I've seen of the feminist movement would seem to indicate that they've lost perspective.  There is no giving men the benefit of the doubt.  If a show has too many male protagonists, it's sexist. If a man lets his wife make all his meals, he's sexist.

And I know what it's like not to be given the benefit of the doubt:  I'm sure there are plenty of other girls who know what I'm talking about as well.  It's that moment where you have a valid complaint and the male on hand doesn't agree with it, so he chalks your behavior up to hormones.  (One guy skipped right to blaming my gender:  "Oh, you're such a girl.  Quit reading between the lines.") Infuriating, no?  So why do we do the same thing to guys???  We don't use the "oh, you're so hormonal" excuse as often, but feminism still likes to devalue male ideas and decisions, usually with sexist accusations, which can be just as bad.

There seems to be this mentality that women are and always will be the underdogs, which naturally gives them sympathetic supremacy.  They can get whatever they want in the name of equal rights.  I feel like the feminists need to give it a rest and remember that men are people, too.  Which leads me to my next point:

Reason Number Three:  It's counterproductive.

Apparently being equal means being identical.  "Anything you can do, I can do better . . ."  But there are very few skills that can be assigned strictly to men or women:  The moment you say women make better (indoor) cooks some guy will show his hand at baking; the moment you say only men can shoot, some chick will pull out a sniper rifle.  There ARE, HOWEVER, SOME THINGS MEN DO BETTER, GENERALLY, THAN WOMEN, AND SOME THINGS WOMEN DO BETTER, GENERALLY, THAN MEN.  And there's no shame in that!

(If you'd like the psychological/physiological picture, evidently guys have larger brains than women while women have a thicker film connecting their brain's hemispheres.  Take that any way you like; I'm not sure what it means.)

I guess the root of this unisex career idea was meant to allow women access to as many jobs as they might like to take on.  Which really isn't a problem, except that a) it's led to this idea that staying at home and raising a family is intrinsically demeaning, and b) it's apparently made women think that being equal to men means they have the "right" to indulge in all the same vices.  Yeah . . . which means more and more "free" women just being free to be sexy.  The image of an oppressed woman is a lady in a burka while the strong, independent woman has a neckline that continues to sink.  And people wonder why men respect women less and less . . .

And that's the thing:  Women's Lib has created a society in which women are basically free prostitutes with their pick of career.  Men are too scared to oppose feminism but are fine with using the new "liberated woman" to their hearts' content.

Reason Number Four:  It devalues men.

I guess I've already pointed this out to some degree, but still:  Feminism devalues men.  Rather than celebrate feminine roles like nurturing or raising children, it screams, "I CAN DO THAT JOB TOO, MOVE OUT OF THE WAY!" and pushes men aside in a mad scramble to prove itself.  In the midst of this, men get the message that they're not needed.

Now, I have heard this or that said to disprove this or that stereotype of men and women alike, but I've never heard it said that men do not need to feel needed.  Which is so cool!  How neat is it that God designed the finer sex with a desire to be needed???  So when women insist that they can do everything on their own, guys lose their interest in supporting them.  There is, after all, one thing women absolutely cannot do, which may serve as a man's last resort . . .

Summary

There are no perfectly defined roles of masculinity or femininity in the world.  That's where we look to the bible:  The husband plays Christ's role over the wife, who plays the part of the church.  I don't see why women complain; I'd rather be the church than Christ any day!!!  And we really have no excuse for our complaining, because we're not meant to be satisfied in our husbands but in our relationship with the genuine Article.

Furthermore, this game of sucking up as much "equality" as possible shows a complete lack of trust.  Men will always be around.  So will women.  We kind of need each other.  Best we band together, no?  I just wish the feminist movement would give up the "You go, girl!" attitude and acknowledge the need to be kind and understanding towards men.  Just because a few guys are absolute chauvinistic jerks doesn't mean we have to project our hurt onto the whole gender:  THAT'S unfair.  Besides, kicking up a storm over sexism in society only seems to illicit lip service (i.e., more tv shows with female protagonists, all of whom can't figure out how to button their shirts) and a hundred more jerks laughing up their sleeves.

I'm not a feminist because I want to be a strong, independent woman of God.  My God takes care of me and validates me:  I don't need to dress like I need any other kind of attention, and I don't need a husband unless God says it's time for me to marry.  In which case I can only hope I wind up with a godly man who totally respects me and that I'll be a godly and submissive wife no matter what.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqF_PtugyBk